Friday, October 5, 2012

crazy?

Dear Julie,

am i getting crazy?

it has been about a month already since he just suddently decided to dump me. the unbearable heart-ache is getting weak little by little, i assume. sometimes i even feel like im getting over him somehow.

i still think of him every freaking day, and it makes me sad and miserable, but i believe it is natural to think of him and miss him now and then after a heart breaking breakup.

however, i sometimes just cannot believe what i think or feel... the last moment, i was thinking like "oh, hey, ive been thinking of him for this whole day, and it doesn't hurt that much. i even think i might be able to handle the situation if he tells me he is already seeing a new girl.". And the next moment, i think like "i miss him so much. why did he have to leave me so suddenly? if i change, will he come back to me? what can i do to make him come back to me? can i call him? can i text him?".

this rollercoster of my feelings drives me crazy. i feel im so unstable and weak. and it clearly says im still stuck in the bottom of the breakup, and i still cannot get over him at all after all.

hey, Julie, i wanna believe that even this kind of craziness is still common among heart broken girls, and it will get better somehow later.